Karma?

I was browing through my email yesterday and I found something in the archive.

An email that was sent to me 8 years ago by a man called James Mattox.
It reads:

"i care about you alot i might not say it but i mean it.
i dont know if you are haveing second thoughts but im am not iwant you more now then ever.
i miss you alot
iwant this to happen if i have to come over there i will
what do you want me to say
i love you i love you i love you
WILL YOU MARRY ME????? WILL YOU MARRY ME???? WILL YOU MARRY ME????
i really wanted to do this in person but if i have to do this now i will
please let me know

james
16 November 2002-Saturday"

I said NO and broke his heart into pieces. I fell in love with someone else, just because James doesn't talked much and kept things to himself.

He came to KL to see me two months after the proposal and we never talked about it. He was still in love with me and just watched me with someone else.

He flew home 10 days later.

The day he reached home I found out the whole truth about him.

Prior to his visit to KL, he went to Kentucky to get the ring I adored so much. He kept it inside his bag with the hope that he got the chance to propose to me again, in person. But he never had the chance.

To make things worst, he already converted to Islam and ready to be married to me with all the documentations with him.

He never had the chance to propose, he never had the chance to tell me that he is a Muslim and the worst part that is killing me until today is that he never given a chance to tell me how much he missed me.

It's KARMA. Now I'm paying it for hurting someone so badly.

I'm sorry James. If you could hear me.


p/s: James remains single until this date.